Like herding puppies through a bacon factory, things haven't been going smoothly. Joseph and his BFFs have returned to Kirtland after the Zion's Camp fiasco. First, Oliver's older brother is sent out to be a missionary, then we learn specifics of how the priesthood works. Specifically, it rewrites church history/timelines such that Joseph
is a legitimate elder in the church rather than just a guy who decided to start a religion.
Patron Bonus Episode: Mormon Craigslist Encounter, The Continuation
CofC: Melchisedec
LDS: Melchizedek
David Whitmer: And Address to All Believers
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Cholera sweeps through the Mormons camped on the Fishing River, which hopefully had nothing to do with the remains of a dead "warrior" that Joseph has been carrying around? Most of the saints stay in Missouri on account of a lack of resources to return to Kirtland, OH. Joseph and his BFFs get on a wagon and return to Ohio.
Check out Zelph on the Shelf here!
They're on YouTube here.
Drink count - 7, or about one beer
The "real" Zelph can be read about here.
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First, a quick recap of Mormon history up until June 1835, then Joseph tells his weary band of followers that this entire walk from Ohio to Missouri has been for naught. Bonus points for victim blaming.
Check out this list of Zion's Camp participants
Patron Bonus: Marie responds to a Mormon Craiglist personals ad
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The church assets continue to be broken up and given to Joseph's inner circle. Who is the treasurer over the new treasury? TBD, we guess.
Patron Bonus: Marie and Amanda tour the church building
Drink count - ??? A couple, probably.
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Read along with us at CompareDandC.com
Podcastriarchal Blessing: Thomas
Podcastriarchal Music: Our Happy Life by Maps and Transit, edited for length